Elvira Gulch lives here

What do you do when you walk in to work one day and the boss says, "Jennifer, you're giving a presentation on rape"?

Well, you give a presentation on rape. But not before lots of cursing and whining under your breath.

Today is my presentation. The entire population of the federal building has been invited, approximately 3,000 people, but I'm hoping for an audience of five or less. What do I know about rape? Geez! Not much, but more than I did a week ago.

Oh well.

Yesterday I found out that Elvira Gulch, (aka The Wicked Witch of the West) lives somewhere on our block. My neighbor called and asked me if I knew the really mean lady that walks up our street. Evidently, the mean lady yelled at the little neighbor boy because his dog was out in the yard without a leash. She told the poor kid that she was going to call the police. Then she yelled at the mother. Granted, the dog should have been on a leash. But don't you think a little boy should be allowed to play with his doggie without being yelled at by Wicked Witches and threatened by the police? And if you could see this dog: He's a dead-ringer for Toto. OK, he's white and Toto was beige, but otherwise he's a dead-ringer. I mean, this is not a scary dog. His name is Buddy for godsakes.

People should not be so damn cranky.